Trying to keep it
together again -
as I battle this
sadness within...
Wondering why
she fell so ill -
Questioning always
how does she feel...
Can she hold on
and end up ok -
will this illness
please go away...
I can't lose another
love of my life -
this year has been
such deathly strife...
Please get well
I love you so -
Precious Sasha
please don't go.
I never hold on
I just look back -
to those moments
that I now lack...
I visit like a ghost
just drifting bye -
no attention needed
no reason to try...
I revisit times
that are far away -
none of it matters
in the current day...
Maybe I looked up
to people that I knew -
not realizing what
I would go through...
but I was there
in a distant memory -
remembering what
will never again be.
I'm doing all I can
to keep you alive -
My only wish is
that you survive...
I miss you and
that personality -
I'm begging you
not to leave me...
Many fun times
lay out ahead -
Many warm nights
snuggled in bed...
We need you here
for the dynamic duo -
get well my baby
please don't go.
I don't belong
anywhere -
Not over here
not over there...
It is always
one more thing -
with all the chores
that my life brings...
Running around
in all directions -
with my choices
as my reflections...
Regrets always
make their way -
as I live this life
one more day.
When cut
over and over
the scar tissue heals...
It becomes
so tough
you can no longer feel...
It's almost
as if
it is void of pain...
That area
will never
feel the same...
Rip off
the band aid
and throw it away...
You never
deserved
to be hurt that way.
I literally love him
more than anything -
when I see him arrive
what joy it brings...
He's so adorable
and precious too -
he's my angel
through and through...
He brings his dog
and hangs for awhile -
he makes me laugh
he makes me smile...
the best blessing
I've ever had -
is my sweet son
and I'm so glad...
that he is here
and I'm able to say -
thank you God
for another day!
I don't want to
but I will -
because that is
the real deal...
If you want money
you play the part -
if you want love
you give your heart...
It's a transaction
no matter who -
it's up to you
what you do...
life is just
a trading game -
you learn the tricks
or you go insane...
but you must always
follow through -
because your future
depends on you.
Sometimes
it's hard to see -
life has blessings
meant to be...
Appreciated
especially for -
giving hope
and expecting more...
So don't forget
to be grateful -
Try to eliminate
all the hateful...
People and things
that bring you down -
never keep
negativity around...
Make choices
that bring you peace -
giving stress
complete release.
Wounded
so many times -
Tears abide from
heartache crimes...
Searching
never to see -
what to choose
what is to be...
Lost
never found -
eventually
they're not around...
Wasting
days and nights -
hoping it
will be alright...
Dreaming
so far away -
it's the same story
on a different day.
There are those
that have no light -
their souls are
as dark as night...
They have no joy
no friendly smiles -
all their words are
of their trials...
Don't let them take
away your grace -
or the happiness
from your face...
Ignore their words
just walk away -
and then enjoy
your happy day.
These goals set
within my mind
include only me...
They are not meant
for anyone else
to decide or see...
I put the pressure
where it belongs
that only I know...
Accomplishing
my intentions
watching myself grow...
My heads held high
no time to stop
for negativity...
I am too busy
on my path
to create a better me.
She was here
this time last year -
now she's gone
and it is clear...
We will never
laugh again -
I don't know how
and don't know when...
This bond we have
could ever sever -
because our bond
goes on forever...
Laughter, tears
and in between -
the things we did
and things we've seen...
Makes me miss you
that much more -
You are loved
that is for sure!
You are different
you matter to me -
I don't know how
to make you see...
That I care what
becomes of you -
and I will do
what you need me to...
I'm there for you
you're there for me -
we are soulmates
for eternity...
Nothing can break
our strange little bond -
even if one of us
is dead and gone...
We had the time
of our lives together -
and you will be
in my heart forever.
I'll live my life without you
just as I did before -
soon I'll grow accustom
to being single and unsure...
You were a special segment
but now it's torn away -
I must put the pieces back
and live now day by day...
Another endless heartache
another teardrop gone -
but I know I've got the strength
I know I can go on...
Your love I'll soon forget
I'll bury it so deep -
it will never haunt me
it I will not keep...
So now it all has ended
the heaven and the hell -
the best to both our futures
and all that time will tell.
Music is like
a time machine -
it takes you back
in a daydream...
All of the sudden
you're ten again -
remembering exactly
what happened then...
You see the moment
you feel the air -
you're alive again
as you were there...
Drifting back
to that moment in time -
as the music fills up
you soul and mind.
I will just keep it
all inside -
and find my trusty
hole to hide...
because I know
in reality -
it is all left
up to me...
Silence echos
in my ears -
to care less evens
out my fears...
because I've learned
it is not there -
and I've learned
to never care.
I think of you
frequently -
do you ever
think of me...
Deep inside
I hope you know -
it was hard
to watch you go...
You made me laugh
and made me cry -
when we said
the final goodbye...
But just because
it wasn't me -
I truly hope
you are happy.
I do admit
it gives me pause -
seeing the scary
turbulent cause...
sends me in a
different direction -
with a lot of
tough reflection...
If it is not
meant to be there -
then I wonder
exactly where...
I should be
or I should go -
and how I will
ever know?
The curtains close
the clock is stopped -
the wood floor creaks
during the walk...
Demons hover
angels soar high -
the key turns quietly
as they die...
Sharp shards cut
the bloody flow -
secrets buried
no one will know...
history hides
beneath the dirt -
as the haunted live
walking the earth.
Save it for
the ride home -
save it until
you are alone...
You can let it
all out then -
by yourself
at least till ten...
Where you can
hide in privacy -
and let the tears
all flow freely.
