Does an angel carry you
gently on her wings -
do you kneel before God
while the angels sing...
Are your ancestors there
or friends that you knew -
Is it like a vivid dream
with a heavenly hue...
What are the heavens
beyond what it shows -
it's a complete mystery
no human can know...
We trust and believe
but it's sobering too -
when your body dies
what becomes of you?
Remember the night
we spilled the whole tray -
that poor waitress
working that day...
Or when you jumped my fence
and said call your mom -
as I worried about Brandon
while I was working and gone...
Or when I broke my fingers
leaving your place -
you called the next day laughing
with love and grace...
Or when Jared saved Garrett
with the abdominal thrust -
and then he kept on eating because
your potato salad was a must...
Or when you taught us all
about planting plants -
after hanging out and sharing
our many political rants...
We hung out at bars at night
and pools during the day -
we took many fun road trips
like Rockport in May...
Our kids, close friends
and all of our pets too -
You loved every single one
and they truly loved you...
D'Bun, Kia, Molly,
Buddy, Sasha and Bear -
through all of my fur babies
you cared and were there...
So how do we live knowing
that you are now gone -
how do we get the strength
to stand up and go on...
For me, in my heart I know
we will be together again -
so save me a seat
and I'll see you then.
Carry yourself
with dignity -
live your life
happily...
follow dreams
show you care -
be smart
play fair...
Do your best to
follow through -
find fun things
there are to do...
Each day is
a new slate -
for you to choose
your own fate.
What else can I do
except pray for you -
as I beg to God
for you to live through...
This horrible cancer
this sudden scare -
with all of my heart
I love you and care...
I keep you close
and dream at night -
that you have won
this unfair fight...
and we will speak
remembering when -
you had a health scare
that was back then.
Thankful for
another day -
Where I will
believe and pray -
To the one who
blesses me -
Blessed life
and blessed be
To the one
who sets me free -
From the ties
I let bind me.
When the memories
no longer sting -
when the thoughts
mean nothing...
It is a sign
you have moved on -
all that was hurt
is healed and gone...
You picked up
and packed it away -
when you thought
heartache would stay...
Now nothing inside
holds onto that time -
believe it or not
it all turned out fine...
So always look forward
to what is meant to be -
and never focus on
past negativity.
I can hear it
calling me -
within three weeks
I will be...
Where the water
meets the sand -
on my happy
sun drenched land...
Flip flops, sundresses
windblown hair -
I can't wait
until I am there...
Palm trees, flowers
drinks on a patio -
I hear it calling
and ready to go..
Breath in the breeze
and salty air -
within three weeks
I will be there!
Determination
drifts through the air -
I awaken to
find it there...
Flowers blossom
all around -
as I listen to
the sound...
of life inching
into the new day -
feeling grateful I am
learning to say...
I'm choosing to
believe in me -
and doing my best
to live happily.
Ding dong
the witch is gone -
the wicked witch
has moved on...
Glad to see
with no apology -
that they have moved
gives me glee...
So many people
left in their wake -
one more problem
one more mistake...
Now they have
moved far away -
karma is a friend
and will always stay...
Near to those who
abuse their power -
leaving behind
all those they devour...
Who remember well
their lies and deceit -
no longer is the world
at their feet.
It was attached
clinging to me -
yet they helped
and broke it free...
Symbolic how
it happened then -
it will not happen
ever again...
Already it is
a lighter feel -
already it is
starting to heal...
Just like the hell
I used to know -
I felt relief
to watch it go!
Mistakes
will be made -
Regrets will
appear...
Showing
forgiveness -
helps
with the fear...
Sometimes
it's you -
and sometimes
it's them...
Accidents
will always -
happen
once again...
Learn
from the sting -
then just
let it go...
Use all
your lessons -
then watch
how you grow.
In the way
on a rainy day -
wish I could
fly far away...
Maybe soar
way up high -
watching life
as it flies bye...
left alone to
ask myself why -
I even ever
start or try...
Never matter
much at all -
standing up to
only fall...
fleeting care
left long ago -
can't lift up
what's very low.
It is where
I should be -
with my family
next to me...
We all laughed
and danced away -
it is where
I should stay...
Happy times
were had by all -
sometimes you need
to have a ball...
enjoying life
with each other -
finding new things
to discover.
Going through the motions
on a dreary day -
wish I was anywhere
that is far away...
If only I was upbeat
as some seem to be -
it never lasts long
at least not with me..
It's hard to fly high
when you ride low -
it's hard to smile
when it's just for show...
Nothing is fulfilling
just more empty words -
thinking it will change
is simply absurd.
It's temporary
anyway -
take it all just
day by day...
Don't get used to
this routine -
things are never
as they seem...
Always be ready
for the new -
moving on is
what's to do...
Don't hold tight
keep at bay -
until it's time to
go away...
and start it all
all over again -
it's not if
it's always when.
They still escape
and rim my eyes -
as I'm left alone
with my cries...
It seems it's just
a waste of hope -
learning again
how to cope...
No one to tell
no one to trust -
doing all the
things I must...
or are expected
to always do -
somehow I have
to pull through.
I will treat you
how you treat me -
it doesn't really matter
who you think you might be...
You are a nothing
inside of my mind -
if you can't be nice
or you can't be kind...
Get out of my face
go far far away -
don't be near me
as I have nothing to say...
Nor do I want to
waste my time with you -
Fuck right off
I have better things to do.
The chains that bind
are locked by you -
you're the one
who must break through...
You care too much
and fret too deep -
you can't undo
so do not keep...
the insecurities
circling around -
keeping you scared
keeping you down...
what was done
and what was said -
living torment
in your head...
let them go
with the cold wind -
you never have to
live it again.
Sometimes we don't make
choices that are good -
sometimes we don't do
what we know we should...
In regretful memories
that break your heart into -
remember you were trying
just to get through...
So give yourself slack
and somewhat of a break -
when you took on decisions
that decided your fate...
be your own best friend
be gentle with your mind -
treat yourself well
and always be kind.
What is there
to look forward to -
what is there
left to do...
been there
done that -
got the shirt
got the hat...
The sun rises
then sets again -
Some with losses
Some with wins...
Nothing exciting
dangling ahead -
close the drapes
crawl in bed...
Not much matters
anyways -
wasted nights
and wasted days.
