The Cross

It's been so many years
since that wooden pew -
and watching the sunrise
service with you...

Hearing you sing out
the old rugged cross -
that stood for him saving
all souls that are lost...

Easter in Ida with
sweet baskets you gave -
eating apple jacks cereal
and the good food you made...

The house smelled so fresh
just like your life -
such a wonderful mother
such a faithful wife...

You always told me
that I was special to you -
Yet, you were my rock
that helped me pull through...

Sickness and chicken pox,
surgery and my son -
I was blessed by God
that you were the one...

He gave to me
to hear about him -
on this holy day
I think about then...

You lived by the good book
and sang I'll fly away -
now you're at his throne
and that's where you'll stay.


.

Refresh

Is there anything out there
that plants the seeds of hope -
that makes the day worthwhile
and it easier to cope...

with day to day distractions
that only stress you out -
and all of the monotony
you'd prefer to live without...

Is there anywhere out there
where the sun kisses your face -
and you sit in total happiness
knowing it is your place...

to finally unwind
and feel happiness that's true -
healing your mind and soul
beneath a sky of blue.

Clear

Delete -
Complete
Never again deceit...

Ran -
Away
no more will I play...

Hide -
Avoid
no more paranoid...

Done -
Gone
time to move it on.

Rush Hour

Walking through
the waterfall -
just wanna run away
and forget it all...

Leave this mess
in my back seat -
and only meet
who I want to meet...

Don't want to waste
more time on stress -
Don't want to live
in this concrete mess...

If I had a horse
I'd ride away -
and leave behind
this steel highway.

Cold

I can feel the frozen chill
all the way to here -
the silence is quite loud,
the message is quite clear...

The truth may have been muffled
yet it made it's way through -
because fake never lasts
and once again it's true...

When the mask is removed
and you stare straight in the eyes -
you see all you have missed
and you learn from all the lies.

Pillows

I dreamed so vivid
I believed it was true -
As I closed my eyes
I believed in you...

Only to awaken
and see the blinding sun -
Peeping through my window
as the night is done...

It was just a vision
just a somber sweet dream -
I wipe my eyes dry
because dreams don't mean a thing...

They're just foggy thoughts
not based in anything true -
just mental mind games
that your conscience travels too.

Hidden

Sometimes -
life takes you by the hand...
and leads you to places
you will never understand...

holding tight
as the ship glides full speed...
letting go
as the wind guides your feet,,,

What will happen now?
What will be perceived?
What will come and go?
What will be freed?

Living in
a chaotic war -
No one is sure
what anything is meant for...

as they spy
their eyes upon your door -
it is all temporary
and that is for sure.

Ice

The cold blows through

and knocks me into -

while all of these memories

sometimes leave me blue...

Like the wintery mix

that waters my eyes -

and the clouded thoughts

I've learned to despise...

I took a long walk

in the icy winter rain -

to chill all the thoughts

and freeze all the pain...

So much has come

and so much has gone -

the only choice left

is to learn to move on...

I have to let go

of all that is frozen -

and leave it in my memory

for the life I have chosen.

Lessons

I guess I'll be ok -
They can say what they want to say...

I'll just hide away -
and take things day by day...

I can't change their mind -
Need to make up for lost time....

Reclaim this life of mine -
and realize I will be fine...

Wipe those teardrops clean -
They don't mean a thing...

Find out what each day brings -
and try to dwell on happy things.

Half Full

You never can tell
what the future holds -
and maybe it's because
you don't really want to know...

Day by day
and year by year -
can leave more questions
and sometimes more fear...

Just trying to make a way
when you seem invisible -
can leave your cup half empty
when it needs to be half full.

Erased

I was up so high
I never realized I could fall -
until I hit the ground
and faced a brick wall...

In the beginning I had hope
to grab a brass ring -
until I saw the truth
that it didn't mean a thing...

I tried will all my might
though even I couldn't see -
why I lost my way
or what it meant to me...

I will never know
what happened to my mind -
I just know it's gone
and left me far behind.

Bye

I have learned
it all again -
no more tears
when I can't win...

letting them go
and slamming the door -
there is no reason
to come back for...

I have left
and I will heal -
learning how
to never feel!

Reality

Three years now
to the date -
it went full circle
and now it's too late...

The shiny lights
the hopeful heart -
was just an act
from the very start...

a foolish burden
that I couldn't bear -
not that it matters
when they don't care.

Sting

Learn -
Feel...
Leave it -
Heal...

I think now
it's all behind -
Dealing with
a realistic mind...

As I put on
my suit of steel -
I'm learning how
to never feel.

Doors

I guess I came through

to the other side -

I try to count how many 

tears I've cried...

Yet here I am

Still on my two feet -

making progress

even through defeat...

I will accept it

I will let it go -

how it affected me

only I will know...

Learning to never

get that close again -

because it only

bites you in the end.

Shooting Star

I tried to catch a shooting star
so bright I couldn't see -
the heat was way too hot
and high and mighty for me...

I tried to capture the bright light
only to be led into the dark -
getting so lost along the way
I almost fell apart...

I may never see
a shooting star again -
but now I know to never grasp
what burns you in the end.

Front Seat

Emerging out of the darkness -
the scary days of haze...
not knowing where to go -
existing through the phase...

of uncontrolled emotion -
gripping from inside...
nowhere to run -
and nowhere to hide...

running through the streets -
searching my way home...
learning once again -
I'm better on my own.

Reflection

One day I will awake and find
I have stopped -

looking...
hoping...
dreaming...

It will have slipped away like water
through my fingers -

unable to be kept...
unable to be grasped...
unable to be mine...

yet...

I will be cleansed and somehow
through its mirrored reflection -

I will find a rainbow
has appeared.

Broken

I feel so small
through it all -
from so high up
it was quite a fall...

No safety net
to soften the blow -
the only choice
was to finally go...

The solitude
will embrace the new -
when there is nothing
left to do...

but lick the wounds
that stabbed my soul -
from when I slipped
and fell so low.

Ripped

The finale
and facing regrets -
I didn't know
how to deal with it...

I wasn't strong
and was so wrong -
I acted a fool
all along...

Rain pounding
like my heart -
never knew
it could rip apart...

and leave my soul
torn into -
I just didn't know
what to do.