You would be
in your twenties now -
if the outcome had been
different somehow...
I wonder what
you would have been -
if that had not
happened then...
The bathroom blood
my agonizing cries -
the trip up the mountain
when I heard your goodbye...
It was traumatic
it tore me into -
I felt the guilt of
not cherishing you...
Because when I did
and became aware -
it was too late
you were no longer there...
I pray from my heart
the sign was true -
Don't worry mommy
I'll look after you.
I'll work on my own
patience and empathy -
I'll try to snuff out anger
and offer sympathy...
Behind closed doors
everyone lives their life -
no one else knows
their problems and strife...
So once again I will
choose to rise above -
and try to fill this world
with happiness and love...
Maybe I will make
someone else feel good -
being the kind of person
that I believe I should.
I believe in me
I don't need you
to do that too...
I wonder to myself
do you even
believe in you...
People come and
then they go
this much is true...
but caring at all
what you think
I assure I will never do.
I don't know why
you're always so rude -
but I'm pretty sick of
your salty attitude...
You create things
to complain about -
you're a miserable person
inside no doubt...
I've decided to
completely ignore you -
I'll always avoid
ever having to do...
anything where
you might be -
I do not appreciate
how you treat me...
I don't want you
as any kind of friend -
so go be hateful elsewhere
this is my end.
Will I make it
I will see -
because sometimes
I want to flee...
from the faces
and monotony -
that I deal with
almost daily...
Little things
are built way high -
watching the clock
slowly go by...
I couldn't care
when or why -
I walk away
and say goodbye.
.
It is always hitting
out of the blue...
but our dear Lisa
We all miss you...
Every day you
cross my mind -
and I remember
this or that time...
It's a physical pain
I'm sure we all feel -
how do we cope
how do we heal...
I often wonder what
your last thoughts were -
I wonder why
there was no cure...
It breaks all of
our hearts into -
why dear God
did it have to be you?
When I am gone
it will be the same way -
with everyone living
day to day...
Only a few
will really care -
remembering when
you were there...
So keep close
your chosen few -
who you love
and who loves you.
